We asked our official brown-guy-Brown-Girl-correspondent what guys really want when it comes to dating and relationships.
by Survam Patel
1. Guys want honesty, not silence! Contrary to popular female belief, it should NOT be expected that a guy can read your mind. So, be straightforward and tell him what’s on your mind. If you want him to do something, don’t throw out some subtle hints. Grow a pair and tell him to his face…nicely!
2. Guys want a woman that chooses them, and does not need them. They prefer an independent woman with her own set of goals, friends, and interests because having an insecure girl that is dependent and takes up all his free time gets to be a drag real quick.
3. Guys want fidelity. Well so do girls – I mean who wouldn’t want some trust. All things that are worth having don’t come easy so when the going gets rough, don’t catch a case of the ‘roaming eye’ but work on the relationship!
4. Guys want acknowledgment. It seems to be happening more often than not these days, but the failure to acknowledge him for his accomplishments, or seemingly trivial acts of kindness, are going more and more unnoticed, leaving the guy feeling inadequate. Women say chivalry is dead, but guess who killed it?
5. Guys want open communication. Being a great listener, as well as a chatterbox, is just as important to a strong relationship. You can’t expect him to listen to you explain about how naïve your parents are, or how you can’t believe one of your friends did something ‘like omg wtf’ and then chastise him for wasting your time because you had to listen to him sound off about his favorite video game or sport team. It’s a two way street woman!
6. Guys just want to have a little fun (no pun intended). All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy! Who would want to be in a relationship that involves awkward silences, arguing, and eventually making up just to do it all over again? Try and partake in his interests so you guys can do something fun together, even if it means picking up that awkwardly contorted Xbox 360 controller and figuring out how the hell to play Halo, or even by learning the player’s names and positions on his favorite team and spewing them out during the next game. He will definitely be surprised, notice it and BAM – you just got yourself a new shopping partner!
7. Guys want a girl who can work the family. I am a little biased on this since this is more of what I want, but I am pretty sure most guys would agree that it wouldn’t hurt if the girl could work everyone in the immediate family. Just think about it – no more having to explain why you guys are spending so much time (and money) on each other because they will like the girl and accept her more easily! So do your homework and especially figure out what his parents want to see in a girl, and even if just for a day, just mold yourself to fit that description. It will definitely get you a free IOU card from him.
8. Guys want a girl with financial responsibility. With our economy in shambles, having two sources of income is becoming the norm to sustain the desired quality of life. Yes, I know this article is about relationships and not marriage, but I am just saying that guys want a girl who will have a stable future and isn’t dependent on him for a source of income. This touches on rule number 2 of guys wanting an independent girl. There is no shame in wanting to marry someone financially well off (I would shack up with a female doctor in a heartbeat), but make sure you have something to bring to the table as well.
9. Guys want a friend. First and foremost a girl should always be a friend, because it is when guys can be the most laid back and open, which is what girls want in the first place. Try and find time to spend regular time together, whether it may be on catching up on some similar shows you watch, movies, dinner, walks, sports, or just plain old chatting it up. My personal favorite is going to a local mellow bar and relaxing with a few drinks. That’s right. You don’t need 7+ people with you every time you go out drinking. So, always think twice and try to place your criticism and condescending remarks on the backburner (whether it is well deserved or not) and try and be that friend you were when you first met the fella!
10. Guys want a good looking girl. You thought I would leave it out didn’t you?! If I did, and some of you girls took this article seriously, then you all would be in those gauchos that make your legs look like elephant trunks and threading would be a phrase from the past. BUT I have polled a sample population (grand total of 3 guys) in steady relationships (over 2 years) and they have said that if most of 1- 9 is there, then the girl is mind numbingly beautiful to them already. So out of all 10, this is the one you would have to worry about the least!
Now girls, do you agree with Survam? It’s your turn to sound off. What do women want in their guy?
Survam Patel – Survam Patel half-assed his undergrad at the University of Texas at Austin and is currently one of the laziest 2nd year pharmacy students that the University of Houston has seen in over a decade. When he isn’t tied down with school he enjoys cooking Indian food (as long as it has meat), watching Texas/Texans football, grilling, music hunting, floating the river, receiving noise complaints, pissing excellence, and watching an array of TV shows he keeps up with (none that have to do with gossip of any kind). He is OCD of sorts in that he ALWAYS has to use his turn signal (even for the most menial of turns), keep his room and bathroom absurdly organized, spell correctly at all times, and check his Gmail at least 5 times a day. He is also the only Survam you will ever meet.