You’re Just not That into Him

by Syeda Hasan

Dating is full of trials and errors, and it can be a drag on anyone. Not every guy will be your prince charming, but there are some Do’s and Don’ts of dealing with a boy who doesn’t quite meet your expectations.

• DON’T lead him on. Although it’s difficult to let a guy down, it will only get harder if you put it off. Leading a boy on because you don’t want to hurt him will only give him false hopes and prevent you from finding someone you’re truly compatible with.
• DO accept that you can’t always be just friends. If a guy truly has feelings for you, he’ll probably have a hard time accepting that you don’t feel the same way. Although you may want to stay friends, he needs time to work out his feelings and see if he can make the transition, and you need to be understanding of that.

• DON’T stay in it for material reasons. Let’s be honest – what girl doesn’t like getting presents? It might be enticing to stay with a guy who showers you with jewelry or fancy dinners. But if a boy is getting you presents to show you he cares, and you don’t have feelings for him, it’s not fair for you to keep accepting them because you’re wasting his time and money.
• DO be straightforward and honest. This is the difficult part, but also the most important. There is no easy way to let a guy know you don’t share his same feelings for you. It can be a scary, awkward, and intimidating thing to do, but by being straightforward, you’ll show your guy that you are mature and respect him enough to be honest with him. You’ll also avoid all the sticky situations that come along with not being honest.
• DON’T stop talking to him without an explanation. If you’ve already gone on a few dates, your guy probably thinks things are going well, even if you don’t feel the same way. If you suddenly stop responding to his calls and texts, he’ll be left wondering what he did wrong. Chances are you two are just not compatible. It may be hard to let him down, but by ignoring him, you’ll just hurt him rather than help him understand how you feel.

• DO keep your own happiness in mind. You might feel pressure from family or friends who think your guy is a great catch. He might be a great guy, but he just might not be The One for you. In the end, it’s your relationship, so don’t forget that you’re out to find your perfect match!
• DON’T settle! Dating is about meeting a variety of people and exploring your options. You may get tired and feel tempted to settle for that almost Mr. Right, but you owe it to yourself and to him to find someone you can fall head over heels for. As the great Carrie Bradshaw once said, “I’m looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love.“ When you find the right one, you’ll know.

Tags: dating, how to, relationships