The Brown List

Sharmeen Hirani takes you on an inside look at what Brown Girls are talking about.

In the Headlines

In the scorching Middle Eastern weather, a family, fed up with the latest ghoulish stunts in their home, reluctantly made a huge decision to press charges..against a genie.  The unidentified Middle Eastern family accused the maliciously playful spirit of sending threats, throwing stones at them, and going as far as stealing their mobile phones, causing the family to move out of their 15-year residence. The local court which is still trying to authenticate the apocryphal story, have prior to this incident heard separate tales of the genie (referred to as a jinn) more than once and have scheduled serious investigation.  That’s great and all, but how will they go about bringing the jinn to court? And is the theft of rollover minutes from a phone plan crossing legal grounds? Obviously there are more discussions ahead of us.

Technology

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no wait, it’s the the super- cell phone! The newly released iPhone 3G S created a hustle amongst avid tech and phone fans. For those who were insatiably lamenting over the lack of videos, MMS and a copy and paste function, (Really? Is it THAT tragic?) the newly released iPhone 3G S raised a silence amongst even the most critical reviewers. With super-speedy performance, new outstanding functions, and a sleeker design, the iPhone gets props for actually focusing on consumer tech-needs. More so than ever, the iPhone has created a major statement amongst fashionistas everywhere including our Brown Girl readers who would undoubtedly rate the phone with a thumbs-up with one hand, while sending a picture text with the other!

Cyberspace

If you thought a date with your crush is embarrassing in an FML sort of way, add in your (too) comfortably clothed parents barging in and yelling at you for talking to boys before marriage, as well the faint smell of curry permeating the air. YOUR life is desi. The hottest new website Mylifeisdesi.com tops out all other reader-interaction websites by displaying embarrassing stories of real life brown people facing their daily spectacles and cultural drama.. “Curry smell and the marriage lecture? That’s sooo old and stereotypical” You really think so? No worries!  Check out the website and you will, with guarantee, laugh a kazillion times, share a quote with a friend or whoever is the closest to you, and then get yelled at by your mom for not studying (in the summer). That’s right, you will have no choice but to look back and realize you were in the same situation 5 seconds ago. MLID.

Fashion

You can finally look stylish and make your mom proud! What a concept! Red-carpet moguls such as Demi Moore and Sarah Jessica Parker have all been rocking the latest in the jewelry trend: Indian inspired accessories. Colorful chandelier earrings, peacock pendants, and finely embellished bangles.  You will astonish all those around you with your natural style of wearing these cultural ornaments. Whereas most of these items can cost up to hundreds of dollars in the department store, you’ve got full free access in your parental unit’s drawers. Show them what you got and work it, girls!

Statistics

Move over younguns! You’ve almost been voted off the island! The latest US Census Bureau reports that within 10 years, older people will outnumber the population of children. The forecast also shows that in the next 30 years, the older population will rise from 7% to 14%. This is mainly due to the rise in childbirth following World War II as well as improvements in health, essentially elongating survival rates of the baby boomers. That’s great for all of them. But what does that mean for us? Says one of our readers,  “As a brown girl that translates to in-laws..eeek!”  Very true, reader. We will be surrounded by MORE long (albeit meaningful) rituals and traditions without a majority say. Good luck to us all!

Pop Culture

June 25, 2009 was a notoriously unforgettable day that reached the heights of landmark events such as man walking on the moon and the death of a president. Pop royalty himself, Michael Joseph Jackson, passed away at the premature age of 50.  The unfortunate event hit the world with a bang, causing one of the highest internet traffic jams in history shortly after the news broke on TMZ, as well as a wave of tributes spreading across multiple technologies and social networks. Fans even jokingly escalated the significance of the event by pointing out that the King’s passing actually caused MTV to play music videos! (Move over ’16 and Pregnant’!)  Why the craze now? The world FINALLY began to see the human qualities of a misunderstood man who actually led quite a tragic life in the face of stardom.  Jackson spent countless hours and a vast amount of money to global efforts which led to his record in the Millenium Issue of the Guiness Book for supporting the most number of charitable organizations.  His heart was truly in the right place, even though we now know that many tried to portray it otherwise. As we pay our respects to the celebrity who even our most traditional parents knew of, we should also take the time acknowledge his efforts to “Heal the World”. For those who refuse to, as Jackson would say, “Just Beat It!”