It was the fourth of July, and I was prepared for the annual wave of patriotism that washes over even the most self-critical corners of the United States. I was unperturbed, my affection for America ripe, the smell of fireworks in the air. But I woke up the next morning, and it got ugly. Time magazine published an opinion (humor?) piece by Joel Stein about Indian immigration in his hometown of Edison, New Jersey. Full of nostalgia and recycled clichés, there isn’t much in it worth talking about. Except that it unveils in spectacular fashion the rhetoric and logic that still lies beneath the sexy, suit-jacketed face of Post-Racial America. (“Post” in the sense that it exists beyond any awareness of what it is to be “racial”.)

Four sips into my free world coffee, and I’m pissed.

As though it weren’t enough to dislodge yourself from the familiar for the promise of something the world insists is “the good life”. As though it weren’t enough to scrounge together an identity and carry it with you in a suitcase ten thousand miles to a place where you must remake home from fragments, against an entirely unfamiliar backdrop. As though it weren’t enough to have no idea who you are and where you fit and how to BE in the world. As though it weren’t enough to deal with the dissolution of self and dreams. Let’s also take on the responsibility of ruining the landscape of American nostalgia.

Sorry, Joel. We totally disturbed your past in pursuit of our futures.

The malls in India really are “that bad”.

Alanis Morissette may have thanked us, but we never got a chance to thank YOU, America. Thank you. Thank you for all that you have allowed us. Thank you for your jobs at desks or in cabs or behind counters, slingin’ donuts or ringing up Slurpees. Thank you for trying so hard to decipher our accents when you’re trying to get your laptop fixed, and for putting up with the overwhelming curry smell we bring with us everywhere we go. Thank you for the eight Oscars, for the occasional pop-culture nod, and for waving a literary hand in the general direction of our experience. Thank you for recognizing our skills, and for telling us what we lack. Thank you for advertising yourself to us, and then withholding. Thank you for luring us away from ourselves, and relocating us in a nowhere. Thank you for letting us lose ourselves trying to be good enough for your left-overs.

So Joel, please let me know the next time you need to watch soft-core porn or steal and I’ll get my shit out of your way. It’s the least I can do for someone who has figured out “why India is so damn poor.” And do accept my apologies on behalf of my fellow countrymen who have flooded you with violent emails. It seems we can’t even be relied on to play Gandhi anymore. What ever happened to bending over and turning the other cheek? Tch.

Last month, thirty-eight year old Nikki Haley won the GOP primary in South Carolina to be the first Indian-American woman candidate for governor.

Haley’s parents are Sikh, and immigrated from India in 1973. Her childhood is peppered with incidents familiar to most Indian immigrant families.   A popular anecdote reported in the mainstream media describes Nikki (born Nikita) entering a local beauty pageant with her sister as a child, pageant officials were flummoxed.  They traditionally awarded a prize to one white child and white black child — they had no idea where to place Nikki. Her brother cut his long hair (a Sikh custom) after being teased at school.

I did not know Nikki Haley was Indian until South Carolina state senator Jake Knotts was reported in the press as saying “”We’ve already got a raghead in the White House, we don’t need another raghead in the governor’s mansion,” and “She’s a raghead that’s ashamed of her religion trying to hide it behind being Methodist for political reasons.”  Knotts later clarified his statements were “intended in jest” and denounced calls for his resignation.

Other negative charges have dogged Haley throughout her campaign. Two men have claimed to have had extramarital affairs with the candidate; Haley has denied the charges.

Haley married a white Methodist man in 1995 and replaced her surname, Randhwa, with her husband’s, Haley. In the “Truth in Facts” section of her website, clearly meant to showcase the most important issues of her campaign, questions include: “Is Nikki her real name?” and “Is Nikki a Christian?”

The underlying message of Nikki’s website and campaign is a Sikh woman named Nikita Randhwa, even if she was born in America, has no chance of being elected governor of a conservative Southern state. Popular precedent agrees.

The most famous Indian-American political figure is Bobby Jindal, Republican governor of Louisiana.  A rising star in the Republican party, Jindal was seriously considered as a possible running mate for John McCain in 2008 and has been suggested as a possible presidential candidate in 2012.  Jindal (born Piyush) also goes by a nickname and converted to Catholicism in college.  His journey to Catholicism started as a teenager and was officially confirmed as a student at Brown University.  In a 2008 Wall Street Journal article, “Rebel With a Cause: Bobby Jindal’s Spiritual Journey,” Suhag Shukla, managing director for the Hindu American Foundation, which represents the interests of the approximately two million Hindus in the U.S., calls him “a mix of hope and disappointment.” She says that “there is hope in what he represents, that an immigrant can hold the highest seat in state government, who doesn’t look like the ‘average American.’ What’s disappointing, though, is at what expense? Does it take turning your back on your tradition? To your community?”

Like Shukla, I am torn between pride and disappointment at these two figures.  For an Indian-American woman to come this far in a governor’s race is truly amazing, but her path to success is troubling.  I choose to believe I do not have to compromise my religion, my culture, my name to succeed in this country but does being a public figure demand this alteration?

And even despite changing their names and religion, will Indian-Americans be fully accepted into the conservative political scene?  Statements by Sen. Knotts and constituent comments in articles about Haley reflect my uneasiness.  Knotts’ racist remarks were excused by his colleagues – who knows what hate speech constituents spew behind closed doors?

I personally don’t agree with Haley’s conservative policies.  But it’s hard to answer whether I would rather have no Indian women in American politics or have a potentially successful candidate who has scrubbed herself of her Indian heritage to succeed.

Haley herself has shied away from the historical implications of her victory.  She recently told the New York Times, ““I love that people think it’s a good story, but I don’t understand how it’s different.”  Indians make up a significant part of the immigrant population in America, in wealth, power, and numbers.  By not discussing her heritage, she risks alienating these voters.

Ultimately, though, I understand why Haley, and other non-white candidates portray themselves the way they do.  Despite Barack Obama’s election, despite Hispanics making up a majority of the population in some states, despite the childhood lesson of America being a “melting pot,” politics is still a white man’s game. Haley’s goal is to become the governor of South Carolina.  That she and other candidates must shed her name and religion to achieve their goals makes me disappointed in our society and political system, not at the candidates themselves.

The NY Times  posted an article disscussing a new survey accross 22 countries that showed a large gap between the sexes when it comes to equality. Even in nations where equal rights are mandated, women continue to struggle to balance home and work.

The article has some interesting statistics on which countries promote equal rights and which ones struggle to even let women work outside of the home.  For example, half or more of those asked in India, Pakistan, and Egypt say that a university education is more important for a boy.

You can check out the article here and let us know what you think!

Times article submitted by BG reader Nita Garg.

Photograph was submitted by Natasha Raheja at Wave Mall in Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh, India.

In another example of Western-style capitalism exerting its influence in the East, McDonald’s new marketing campaign for India tries to make a connection  between misogyny and pleasure.

The campaign’s slogan, “Har Chhoti Khushi Ka Celebration” is promoting the expansion of McDonald’s India ‘Happy Price Menu’ similar to the Dollar Menu in the United States with all items under Rs. 20.  According to a press release from McDonald’s India website, the new campaign aims to “highlight the fact that it offers value through its ‘Happy Price Menu’ for those who come to McDonald’s to celebrate the small pleasures of life be it a good parking space or having a chance to date girlfriend and ex-girlfriend together etc.”

Reading the official press release boggles the mind.  How is snagging a close parking place comparable to dating two women at the same time? The visual ad shows a man sitting next to a woman with another woman sits looking on.

More than being offended at this ad, I’m really puzzled.  So getting a deal on addictive, unhealthy food is like going on a date with another woman with the permission of your girlfriend?  In still-conservative India, the experience of cheating on one’s partner is to be aspired to? And even though I understand fast food restaurants in India are looked as novel examples of wealth, McDonald’s still seems like an unromantic meeting place.

In the press release, Marketing Director Arvind Singhal says of the new ad: “The

Indian consumers are value conscious and also need to perceive McDonald’s as an affordable eating out option.” So this ad is rewarding Indians “value conscious” taste in food and women.  Flattering.

As someone who has lived her entire life in America, this ad is not surprising because I see the visual of women being treated as objects every day – on billboards, commercials, and magazines.  At home, however, the traditional Indians values my parents taught went against the demeaning voice of advertising.  It’s sad to that in the quest for capitalism, companies like McDonald’s are influencing the cultural messages for young Indians.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am absolutely obsessed with football (go Patriots!) and like any true sports fan, the successes and failures of my team can greatly affect my day, month, or even sometimes, my year (Giants v Patriots, anyone?). However, there is another game out there that influences the trajectory of women’s lives regardless of their affinity for the pigskin. This game doesn’t have a time limit or even cute boys running around in tight capri-like bottoms. It’s the same game that our mothers and their mothers have been playing for their whole lives. It’s the waiting game.

The notion of the waiting game (or as my friend calls it, “Sleeping Beauty Syndrome”) stems from the belief that women go through the motions of life, higher education, etc. just to find their “prince charming” and to eventually settle into gender roles. However, this phenomenon has taken on an interesting identity in Asian communities. Though research has shown that Asian women are one of the most educated segments of our population, they still seem to fall prey to the waiting game.

To be honest, I was very skeptical that the waiting game still existed. Unlike our predecessors from earlier generations, we, as Asian women, are encouraged to pursue higher educational opportunities and high-powered careers in medicine, business, and engineering. Ultimately, we are encouraged to be independent and financially successful – or so I thought. My enlightenment (as do many of them) occurred during a conversation with my mother. In efforts to persuade me to pursue a career in medicine she reasoned that “it was the perfect profession for a girl.”

Upon initial examination, my mother’s statement may seem ludicrous. After all, how are the long hours of medical school, residency, and fellowships conducive to starting a family (the supposed dream of all young girls)? However, the truth behind this declaration can be found in the minor limitations placed on such high-powered careers because of cultural expectations. In other words, though an Asian woman might have an M.D/PhD, it is more acceptable/likely that she will be a pediatrician, gynecologist, etc. than a neurosurgeon since a schedule filled with flu shots instead of craniotomies is more conducive to getting a cooker filled with rice on the dinner table by 5 pm (or in my house, 8 pm).  In turn, she is forced to wait; wait for her husband to come home from his more strenuous (but financially rewarding) job; or wait to climb her own professional ladder because she absolutely has to have kids before the age of thirty.

Though the circumstances under which we play this game have changed over the past several decades, the greater goals of this endeavor have stayed the same. In fact, one could argue that the only difference between iterations of the “waiting game” is that it is somewhat longer now than before. This might be in part due to the economy and the fact that even men are finding it harder to secure a steady job before settling down. Unfortunately, the strides that have been made by women into the professional sector are completely undermined if we continue to play this game. The only way that we can truly achieve equality is if we stop waiting and start moving.

Recently, the upper house of India’s Parliament passed a bill Tuesday that would amend the Constiution to reserve one-third of the seats in India’s national and state legislatures for women. The controversial bill has a long way to go, yet has stirred up strong sentiments on both sides.

Though India has seen strong female leadership and women are beginning to move up in their careers, much of the country’s women face enormous hardships and certainly do not have the opportunities that their male counterparts see. The bill aims to better the lot of women as a whole in India and allow them easier access to government. However, opponents of the bill fear many repercussions for a set quota of women in government. For example, there is the risk that rich, powerful men could use their wives and daughters as political puppets.

You can read the full article here and tell us what you think!

As a child, I moved around frequently. My parents emigrated from India to the U.S. when I wasn’t even five years old, and we moved from place to place. It seems that I’ve perpetually been stuck with the “New Kid Syndrome” for most of my life.

Unfortunately for me, the schools I attended weren’t ever very religiously diverse. Christians usually made up the vast majority of my peers. It was quite lonely for a little Hindu child like me not having anyone or anything to relate to. Ah, but then there was always Social Studies – my favorite subject. No matter what book we learned from, India was mentioned. As the second most populated country in the world – it had to be. Finally, something I could relate to! With the mention of India always came mention of Hinduism, the religion my family practiced. I always looked forward talking about Hinduism in school because I was almost always the only Hindu around, which instantly made me exotic and the center of attention.

“Wow, cool! There are all these cool-looking gods and goddesses with so many heads and arms! You really believe in all of them?” kids would ask me.

Hey, wait a second, there’s not really more than one God. And why are Shiva, Vishnu, Saraswati, and Lakshmi being referred to as ‘gods’ and ‘goddesses?’ The Bhagavad-Gita is mythology? Like Greek mythology? This doesn’t sound right…

This was an experience I dealt with many years ago, and interestingly enough many Hindus are still dealing with today: the misrepresentation and subsequent belittlement of Hinduism. For a religion as established and tolerant as Hinduism, it is disrespected in the West through other outlets than just public education. Through media and marketable fashions and trends, the face of Hinduism becomes no more than what is represented by many in the West, a “mythological,” pagan religion.

The first issue to address is the fact that many in the West, including scholars, refer to Hinduism as “mythology.” This is by far one of the most insulting descriptions to characterize the religion with. By describing Hinduism as mythology, one suggests that Hindu beliefs are simply a collection of folklore and tales, too fantastic to be real. In reality, all religions are theoretically mythological because no one religion can prove its validity. Can Christians prove that the word of The Bible comes directly from God? Can they prove that the world was created in seven days? No, but even so Christianity’s core beliefs are rarely described as myths. Rather, they are referred to as “teachings of Christ.” Why then refer to Hindu beliefs as myths and not just what they are also – beliefs? Perhaps in a part of the world where monotheistic religions rule, it is difficult to see truth in a religion with so many faces of God. It is simply easier to cast it off as a sensational belief system. Many don’t regard how insulting it is to Hindus to be told they believe in something that’s, frankly, false. We’re not asking for special treatment or a pretty, little pedestal, but it would be nice if we could stop with the mythology nonsense.

There’s also the issue of referring to the deities as “gods” and “goddesses” rather than “Gods” and “Goddesses”. Again, because the West is dominated by monotheistic religions, it seems nonsensical to give a respectful title to many forms that claim to be “God.” Major religions such as Christianity, Judaism, and Islam prevail in numbers of worshippers and they give claim to only one God. Although Hindus believe in one supreme entity, most don’t understand how there can be so many forms and therefore, they must be referred to as less important “gods.” What most don’t realize is that this is truly disrespectful to Hindus to have Shiva or Ganesh or Krishna referred to as a lowly god, when they serve as core representations of their faith.

As a journalist, I often refer to my AP Stylebook, as many editors require their reporters to follow guidelines set by the Associated Press. Unfortunately for me and other Hindu writers out there, it requires that we refer to these deities in lowercase form. Although because AP Style instructs to “lowercase gods and goddesses in references to the deities of polytheistic religions,” and Hinduism is not polytheistic, as many people assume, but actually polymorphic, I technically could capitalize “God” and “Goddess” when referring to any of the Hindu deities. I doubt, though, an editor would side with me on a technicality he believes to be minor. Of course – therein lies the problem – it is a minor technicality to those outside the religion and the exact opposite to those within.

Former AP reporter and current religion reporter for the San Antonio Express-News, Abe Levy says the rules probably won’t change because numbers usually rule, and the numbers unfortunately don’t lie with Hindus in the West, and he’s probably right (although even he makes the mistake of calling Hinduism polytheistic).

“I think the honest truth is that monotheistic faiths – the world’s largest three of Islam, Judaism and Christianity — share this belief in one God and so until polytheistic faiths in the U.S. break out of their minority status numerically and politically, it won’t change. Is that fair? No. It’s more of a pragmatic solution given the sheer numbers of Muslims, Jews and Christians and their stamp on U.S. history and culture.”

Some say ignorance is bliss – but I have to disagree (at least when it comes to religion). The problem with ignorance is that it usually leads to misconception, and that is definitely not bliss. Misconceptions in the hands of scholars and educators are just plain dangerous. Incorrect and misleading information about Hinduism has often been printed in textbooks and reference books. Public education is a powerful source of information, especially for young people learning about world religions for the first time. What happens when a Hindu child goes to school and reads, “Durga and Kali are terrible and extremely bloodthirsty forms of this goddess,” in a textbook like “The Ancient South Asian World” printed by the Oxford University Press? What about learning that The Mahabharata, an ancient Hindu scripture is described as being, “…like adventure movies of today [that tell] thrilling stories about great heroes” as described in Glencoe-McGraw Hill’s “Discovering Our Past – Ancient Civilizations” textbook? These are certainly not accurate statements about Hinduism, and what’s worse is that they are superficial. Jesus’ crucifixion is never referred to as a “gripping, emotional roller coaster” so why precede the description of a Hindu script with such an introduction? Furthermore, describing Durga and Kali with such adjectives as “terrible” and “bloodthirsty” paints vivid pictures in impressionable minds of demons and monsters like those right out of fairytales. Of course it’s understandable that Hindus and non-Hindus, alike, assume that Hinduism is a pagan religion when scholars describe important figures as elaborate, animalistic idols. Monsters can’t be worshipped as God, so the very idea of Hindu teaching seems ridiculous.

Dictionary.com’s description of Krishna is as “one of the most popular gods…[who is] worshipped in several forms [such as] as the divine cowherd whose erotic exploits, esp. with his favorite, Radha, have produced both romantic and religious literature.” The relationship between Krishna and Radha is one of pure, eternal love as described by Hindu scriptures, and to reduce it to an “erotic exploit” conveys it as simply a sexual relationship, in which Krishna is the hunk who gets all the girls. This description reduces a major form of God to human form, and worse, shows him in an especially bad light by making him sound like a flirt.

Jasneshwari Dev, a spiritual teacher at Barsana Dham Temple in Austin, Texas has written letters to book publishers and conveyed the Hindu community’s disappointment in such wrongful descriptions in hopes to promote better education of Westerners about Hinduism.  She says the description of Krishna is completely inappropriate and misleading.

“Using the word “erotic” to describe the love between Radha and Krishna shows the ignorance of the writer.  God’s love is beyond the conception of the human mind.  But Hinduism does teach us that God is beyond all such human emotions of lust, anger, greed, jealously.  The use of this word to describe God is highly offensive to Hindus.”

It’s interesting the fascination people have with fantasy and things that seem non-human and unrealistic. Hinduism again falls into this superficial category and over the years, it has become increasingly “cool” (and profitable) to use colorful images of Hindu figures and symbols on anything from T-shirts and home furnishings to even costumes and restaurant advertisements. Most have no idea what any of these images represent, but again the obsession with things that seem unreal prevails. And if it makes a product sell, then by all means go for it, right? Sadly, many would say “yes.”

This past summer in Spain, fast food giant Burger King revealed a new ad campaign depicting an image of Lakshmi sitting on a hamburger. The caption underneath translated to “This snack is sacred.” The image was used to increase Burger King’s profits and many Hindus saw it as sacrilege. It seemed to be a mockery and a sarcastic pun at the fact that most know that Hindus don’t eat beef.

Last year supermodel Heidi Klum, known for her extravagant Halloween parties, dressed to impress – in a Kali costume. While it was a very colorful and elaborate costume, it’s despicable that she would choose, once again, a very sacred figure to dress up as. How would Christians feel if someone showed up with an expensive costume depicting the Virgin Mary – or worse – Jesus Christ? Maybe it wouldn’t bother many, but what if the culprit were the last person in the world that should to be representing a pious, pure Mary or a humble, selfless Jesus? No one wants others badly representing something they hold dear, and Hindus are no different. Not to say Heidi Klum is a bad person, but she’s not even Hindu and who knows what kind of frolicking went on at her party?

Cafepress.com has a variety of fashions available with Hindu connotations to them, including a couple with the images of Ganesh and Shiva reading “Ganesh/Shiva is my Om Boy” playing off the popular slang term “homeboy” referring to a good friend. It’s funny and it’s cool looking, but I doubt most of the people wearing those shirts have any spiritual relationship with either God to lay claim to the phrase. But of course, that doesn’t matter most of the time.

Some might say these things aren’t big deals because many don’t mean any blatant disrespect, but what they don’t realize is the sheer disregard this shows for Hinduism as a religion deserving of respect. Small things have big impacts. Tolerance is stressed heavily in the West, but maybe empathy and education should be stressed more. Knowledge opens doors and it could be the key for Hinduism finally to receive more respect as the ancient, established, and welcoming religion it really is.

Senior and officer of The University of Texas’s chapter of The Hindu Students Council, Atul Agrawl says he believes that he sees hope for the future, but it will take dedication on the parts of many Hindus and non-Hindus, alike, to make a real difference of how Hinduism is viewed in the West.

“I believe the key thing to removing ignorance is subtlety. For example, yoga has hugely impacted Americans for health reasons. While many people do not divulge into where it originated or the deeper meaning, there are others who do. While the goal is to educate everyone, it has to be one step at a time.”

]]> http://browngirlmagazine.com/2010/02/western-condescension-of-hinduism/feed/ 5 http://browngirlmagazine.com/2010/01/dating-dilemmas/ http://browngirlmagazine.com/2010/01/dating-dilemmas/#comments Sun, 24 Jan 2010 20:48:07 +0000 browngirlmag http://browngirlmagazine.com/?p=1458 by Syeda Hasan

An awkward silence fills the room as she searches for something to focus her attention on. The pattern on the curtains, the number of tiles in the floor — anything to save her from having the conversation her mother is attempting to impose on her right now.

“Fatima, I think it’s important to discuss this,” her mother said. “I’d like to know how far you’re going with this new boyfriend of yours.”

University of Texas junior Fatima Ali (name changed for privacy) is one of countless students who has a difficult time discussing sex and relationships with her parents. She said that as a Muslim woman of Pakistani decent, she feels her ethnic and religious background has a major impact on her comfort level when it comes to being open with her parents about these subjects, as people of this background are typically forbidden from dating and have arranged marriages.

She told her mother about her current boyfriend after her mother became suspicious of her late-night phone calls, but her father has yet to find out about her new relationship, Fatima said. She said her mother tries to stay informed about what is going on in her relationship with her boyfriend, but discussing it tends to be a bit awkward and uncomfortable.

“My parents are pretty open, and my dad encourages us to talk to him about stuff, but I would just feel weird, especially because I feel like he would think it’s wrong for me to be with a guy unless it’s time for marriage,” she said.

The lack of communication between South Asian parents and teens about dating and romantic relationships can be dangerous, she said, because it can lead to teenagers being potentially misinformed about safe sex and dating practices if they rely solely on information from their friends and peers.

“I definitely believe in the old person’s wisdom, so without it we’re all just a mess,” she said. “Kids hear things from friends and just think, ‘ok, that must be right.’ At least schools talk about safe sex, so that’s good.”

University of Texas sophomore Sneh Shah said that as a Hindu Indian woman, her parents also forbid her from dating because of their culture’s conservative attitudes towards teens dating.

“My parents are against dating for the most part and so if I was to get into a relationship, I would probably be extremely hesitant to tell them until I was sure that they would approve of the guy and until I was sure that I wanted the guy to meet my family,” she said.

She said she feels that schools do an adequate job of preparing kids when it comes to being informed about safe sex and dating practices, but having an open discussion on these topics with parents is important because it can make it even more likely that teens who have this support system will feel confident and informed enough about these issues to make good decisions in their relationships.

Austin Community College sophomore Daniela Lopez said that when she started dating at 16, her father did not approve and felt she was too young to be romantically involved with boys.

“Latins tend to be very conservative about these things,” she said. “They can be very protective, especially since I’m the youngest one. But at the same time, [my father] knew that it was going to happen at some time.”

High teen pregnancy rates results occur in areas where information and education are not readily available, she said. Parents should inform their children about safe sex practices, but also advise them to wait till they are old enough and emotionally mature enough to handle the responsibilities of sex and the potential for pregnancy.

“It’s important to have those discussions, but more importantly, give moral values,” Lopez said. “If your moral values are well stated, then it’s harder to break them no matter how much pressure is put on you in a relationship.”

]]> http://browngirlmagazine.com/2010/01/dating-dilemmas/feed/ 0 http://browngirlmagazine.com/2009/09/the-culture-vs-politics-debate/ http://browngirlmagazine.com/2009/09/the-culture-vs-politics-debate/#comments Sat, 12 Sep 2009 21:34:57 +0000 browngirlmag http://browngirlmagazine.com/?p=1210 by Sharmeen Hirani

French lawmakers want to study the prevalence of the Islamic burqa in hopes of banning the customary garment on public French grounds. This proposal coming shortly after the 2004 banning of the headscarf along with other religious displays in public schools. For years, France has pushed to maintain its westernized traditions. A ban on the burqa, according to lawmakers, is a way to ensure the secular lifestyle is encouraged within the country. In support of this thought, President Nicolas Sarcozy states that the burqa seemingly is a sign of the “subjugation of women” and as such is “not welcome in France”. In addition, the head of the present conservative party, Jean – Francois Cope insists that the veiling of women presents a “problem of security and public order” because they conceal the wearer’s identity. Consequently, “these clothes exclude women from the national community, [and] deny their identity”.

The principle behind the garment, which has been in presence since before the establishment of Islam, is that the covering sustains the modesty of women. What most people do not realize is that the burqa and the niqab are not specifically a Quranic or Islamic decree.  According to the late Sir Shah Muhammad Sulaiman, a great authority on Islamic Law and Muslim society, “[The burqa’s] use is only traditional as copied from other nations, and which Muslims gradually exaggerated, giving it a religious significance… [the burqa] has no religious basis whatsoever.”  For years, strict Quranic interpretations had created a forceful law in conservative countries in the Middle East such as Taliban-led Afghanistan.  However, in countries that do not mandate the garment, some Muslim women wear it merely for the sake of preserving tradition.

The proposition has raised a few eyebrows and sparked a global debate amongst both religious and political figures around the world.  On the one hand, a country is looking out for their female members of society and equilibrating their status with their male counterparts. On the other hand, France expects women to sacrifice a preserved practice, which they have only known their entire lives.  A conundrum, indeed, but can there really be a right answer?

For the sake of liberating women through cultural reform, is it right for a government to completely ban a multi-century long tradition?

Here are what some Brown Girl readers had to say:

“Though they might feel they are liberating them, many Muslim women choose to wear it out of respect and tradition. Instead they are hindering these women from expressing themselves by outlawing [the hijab]”

“I feel that part of being a member of the 21^st century should include the right to act and dress however one wants. Much in the same way, the Jewish community would and should, protest at the banning of the yarmulke, so do Muslims have a right to protest the ban of burqas. It’s more than just religious, its cultural, and its ridiculous to think they have a legitimate reason for doing it. If they are concerned about the safety of citizens, beef up police forces. This also just reinforces in the minds of Muslim countries how seemingly anti-Islam the western world is.”

“I think it’s your basic right to be able to practice your religion and culture in any way you want. However, the issue here is religious, not cultural. A burqa is a symbol of the Islamic religion, granted it’s use is very subjective according to how religion is interpreted. If the government bans the burqa, then they need to use the same rues to outlaw rosary beads and crosses. Globalization and westernization should be applied to all religions”.

“Since when was it okay for a country to mandate what a person can or cannot wear? If westernization is so important, the freedom of expression should equally be kept up as a high standard. Women who cover themselves with the burqa or the headscarf are expressing their cultural tradition.  This may be all that these women know, and forceful dressing otherwise, may be traumatically embarrassing and uncomfortable.  Thus, by completely outlawing a form of dress, is France not (in reverse) defeating the purpose of its message of freedom?”

As the debate continues across the world, we can only hope that a deep discussion from both standpoints is ascertained before a final decision is made. Feel free to post your opinion!

Dating is full of trials and errors, and it can be a drag on anyone. Not every guy will be your prince charming, but there are some Do’s and Don’ts of dealing with a boy who doesn’t quite meet your expectations.

• DON’T lead him on. Although it’s difficult to let a guy down, it will only get harder if you put it off. Leading a boy on because you don’t want to hurt him will only give him false hopes and prevent you from finding someone you’re truly compatible with.
• DO accept that you can’t always be just friends. If a guy truly has feelings for you, he’ll probably have a hard time accepting that you don’t feel the same way. Although you may want to stay friends, he needs time to work out his feelings and see if he can make the transition, and you need to be understanding of that.

• DON’T stay in it for material reasons. Let’s be honest – what girl doesn’t like getting presents? It might be enticing to stay with a guy who showers you with jewelry or fancy dinners. But if a boy is getting you presents to show you he cares, and you don’t have feelings for him, it’s not fair for you to keep accepting them because you’re wasting his time and money.
• DO be straightforward and honest. This is the difficult part, but also the most important. There is no easy way to let a guy know you don’t share his same feelings for you. It can be a scary, awkward, and intimidating thing to do, but by being straightforward, you’ll show your guy that you are mature and respect him enough to be honest with him. You’ll also avoid all the sticky situations that come along with not being honest.
• DON’T stop talking to him without an explanation. If you’ve already gone on a few dates, your guy probably thinks things are going well, even if you don’t feel the same way. If you suddenly stop responding to his calls and texts, he’ll be left wondering what he did wrong. Chances are you two are just not compatible. It may be hard to let him down, but by ignoring him, you’ll just hurt him rather than help him understand how you feel.

• DO keep your own happiness in mind. You might feel pressure from family or friends who think your guy is a great catch. He might be a great guy, but he just might not be The One for you. In the end, it’s your relationship, so don’t forget that you’re out to find your perfect match!
• DON’T settle! Dating is about meeting a variety of people and exploring your options. You may get tired and feel tempted to settle for that almost Mr. Right, but you owe it to yourself and to him to find someone you can fall head over heels for. As the great Carrie Bradshaw once said, “I’m looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love.“ When you find the right one, you’ll know.

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