What if I don’t want to study medicine or engineering?

Dear beta,

Join the club. This is another tough road to take, but don’t worry, others have done it before you and survived. There are many Indian-Americans studying and doing unconventional careers. I think it is perfectly fine to study things besides medicine and engineering. We need artists, film-makers, novelists and philosophers in this world to make it more interesting!

So, as Nike used to say, just do it. Be smart about it. Do research on the field you’re considering. Talk to people who are in the field. Use your social contacts to find people that you might be able to talk to and be prepared when you discuss your thoughts with this person.

Another thing you will need is strength. Take it from me, beta, you will get many questions and strange looks from other South Asians. Be confident in your choice. When someone asks you what you’re going to do with a degree in whatever-it-is, look her in the eye and tell her. You know what is best for you and if that is underwater basket weaving, then by all means, weave baskets under water.

If you can find a mentor who is South Asian, this will give you some support. If you find an aunty or an uncle or a cousin or a friend who knows someone in your field, see if you can establish a mentorship with them. All you need to do is ask. There are many people out there who want to guide younger people. This can be an extremely valuable resource for you.

Good luck! You can do it.

A philosophy graduate of an esteemed  liberal arts college for women, Seema Aunty has dedicated her career thus far in promoting causes for young women and the South Asian community. With a strong knowledge base formed from her own experiences growing up in a South Asian household, Seema Aunty advises young women on a variety of topics, ranging from family, relationships, and culture.

In her own words: “I know it is hard to reconcile the idea of rugged individualism with conservative desi values. Growing up was difficult. It isn’t easy to find a place for oneself in this world when we hear mixed messages about who and how we are supposed to be. I hope that what I have learned from my own life might be of some interest to young women who are now coping with difficult issues.”

If you would like Seema Aunty to answer your burning questions, please feel free to write to her at seemaaunty@browngirlmagazine.com. All submissions will be kept confidential.

Have you ever felt as if you were in a tug of war between two worlds?  Or even questioned traditions and customs that you at first grew to accept without really enquiring whether there is any validity behind them?  Maybe you worked your hardest to achieve something that you wanted only to be criticized and doubted?

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions, then you will find yourself relating to Amrit Singh, the protagonist of Ocean of Pearls.  I am usually drawn to films that focus on the South Asian diaspora but are in English. Ocean of Pearls falls into this category and is now easily one of my favorite movies of all time. No matter if you are South Asian or not, you can easily find yourself relating to the situations that befall on Amrit in this movie.

The award winning film focuses on Amrit, a Sikh doctor from a very religious and traditional Sikh family. Amrit moves to Detroit to serve as the potential new face of an extremely promising organ transplant program.  Growing up in the Western world and then facing the dilemmas that his new job soon start to wear on Amrit. He begins to think that maybe the strict religious rules of his family may not be appropriate for the world that he lives in.  He encounters numerous racial obstacles in his path to success that hinder him from achieving what he hopes and attaining the recognition he deserves. After a while, Amrit decides that in order to accomplish anything the way he wants, he must take a drastic decision that his family and traditions condemn.

Amrit finds himself dealing with changes in every aspect of his life: his career, his family, his relationship, and most drastically, his values.  Ocean of Pearls explores the journey that Amrit takes to find himself when all he has known until now is confusion.

Ocean of Pearls is realistic and can appeal to a whole range of individuals, especially South Asians who often have to find a medium between adjusting to the way things are and the way their parents think things are.

You can check out the trailer below:

Ocean of Pearls is Directed by Sarab Singh Neelam

The changing face of medical care – How more and more women are entering the medical profession and what that could mean about care.

Pakistani women move beyond traditional roles – How the U.N. Centers for Excellence and Rural Development are improving the lives of women in Pakistan

Women at the Drawing Board – Most top design schools now have a majority of female students

Rural women in India using science to fight poverty – a great picture slide show

Women: A work never done - some great stats on women in business and in government

NPR Double Take – some fun cartoons about IWD

Womencession - the possibility of the new “recession” targeted towards women and their jobs

By default, most Indians around the world associate Aishwarya Rai Bachchan as the brand ambassador to Bollywood. And thus, she becomes the face for Indian women all over. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with her representation in terms of her grace and stature, it would be unfair to equate every Indian woman with Aishwarya. What’s more, is that quite honestly, the country is filled with ladies who could easily be bestowed with this title and would probably do innate justice to it; more so than Ash. As a country whose democracy has been challenged numerous times, it has still managed to house woman who have sat on the Prime Minister chair, been to space and even won the Nobel Peace Prize. So it is really fair to associate sheer beauty with representation? It’s almost as though nothing else matters. Morals, tradition, culture and intellect; all these qualities are simply thrown out the window simply because XYZ exhibits Indian exquisiteness. But the modern Indian woman is much more than that.

There is a reason as to why Aishwarya Rai Bachchan lost out to Sushmita Sen with the latter becoming Miss Universe while the prior took on the Miss World crown. While Ash may be beautiful, Sush is ten steps ahead of her in the intellect arena. In fact, when it comes to public speaking, Sen is known for being honest, forthright and incredibly candid. That cannot be said about Ash unfortunately who chooses to hide behind her diplomacy and giggles. Granted as an actress Sen has seen little success but on a humanities level, the ex-Miss Universe is regarded as one of the most giving and compassionate Indian women in the subcontinent. After adopting a baby girl in her mid-twenties, she went on this year to become a mother again after she adopted another child. Her contribution to society is often perceived as selfless. But besides being benevolent and beautiful, it is her magnetic personality that has people flocking to her. And this is pertaining to every issue she associates herself with. Whether she is out and about talking about a film or an organization she has chosen to add her name too, her choice of words often has the media asking for more. Educated and in tune with international affairs, there is never really a moment the actress is stumped for words. She represents the New Age Indian woman.

If not Sush, then how about Shabana Azmi. The veteran actress who is shies from the media is well known in both acting and political fields; yet again, a woman often shocks as she mixes her modern and traditional thoughts. Meshed together, she has created a persona for herself that can hardly be imitated. On a global platform, she never fails to mesmerize audiences convincing them that India is a country to truly watch out for as she just out numbers and pieces of information that is truly ravishing. Beautiful needless to say, Azmi knows her poets from shayars and speaks with a great amount of dignity. While her statements may get her into trouble, she always manages to swim away from them looking yet again like the hero(ine) that she is. Women like Shabana Azmi tell the world that despite the global influence on India, the country still houses the same traditions that existed years ago.

Kiran Bedi, India’s Top Cop, as she is known, is a foreign name abroad sadly. At 61 she stands tall as she aims to create a safer India through her organization, Safer India. After retiring from the Indian Police Service, she realized the need to form Safer India when many complaints that were lodged by locals were simply ignored. But her accomplishments post her stint as a police officer has found her more accolades than ever. In the past, many of her antics have put her in the news which she would simply call, “doing her job”. Her fearless attitude and willingness to bring change to the Indian society has been saluted. Even now, she feels her work is not done and her service to the country is still pending.

Three out of hundreds of women who would and could represent the country more effectively and correctly abroad. And besides being beautiful, they inhibit much more. As a rising nation, it is important for the world to realize and recognize that there is more to the Indian woman than simply being beautiful. The modern day Indian woman is contemporary and yet orthodox, intelligent and fearless, sacrificial with reason and yet, independent. And yes, she is beautiful.

I can still remember the feeling of embarrassment and contempt I felt at my culture when my 5^th grade teacher refused to take any of the food I made because she thought I had a disease that afflicted my hands. That “disease” was my henna. Growing up in the suburbs meant to conform to the cookie cutter mold; being different was not a good thing. My henna, my mum’s Indian clothes at Open Houses, and the smell of spices permeating from my house were all frowned upon. I did not care though. I wanted to fit in so badly, so badly that I would happily give up anything. What was the price for my spot in the assembly line you ask? My culture.

As a child, I wanted so desperately to be a part of 90’s American culture. I pretended to know all the words to the latest Backstreet Boys and NSYNC songs. I got dressed up and fumbled my way through awkward middle school dances. I ate sloppy Joes and made sure to make a mess of my face and shirt. I entered talent shows and did renditions of Britney Spears “Hit Me Baby One More Time.” I harassed my parents for the latest fad: Giga Pets, Doc Martens, Pogs, etc. I did everything I could think of so my friends would think I was one of them. While I was hard at work on my self-transformation, I completely neglected my Indian culture. I shunned Bollywood. I scoffed at kids who came to school in Indian clothes. I made fun of girls with henna on their hands even though, secretly, I envied the beauty and color of it. I argued incessantly with my mum about why we were eating Gujarati food every day. Was it too much to ask for to have a pizza or some other typical “American” meal? My mum and I got into countless debates and arguments about my lack of enthusiasm for the Indian culture. She didn’t understand why I was trying so hard to hide a piece of myself, and I didn’t understand why she was sabotaging my quest to be a REAL American.

When I visited India a few years ago, I saw the overwhelming display of culture surrounding me, and I was utterly consumed by it. Temples made from pure white marble, chiseled by hand, and with more love and devotion than I could imagine were everywhere. Food stalls emitting heavenly smells of freshly fried Jalebi sent my nostrils into frenzy. Motorcycles, cars, rickshaws, and bicycles navigating roads filled with cows, goats, dogs, cats, and chickens left me awestruck. Bollywood songs blasting from small radios inside sari shops that offered the loveliest outfits in the most vibrant hues imaginable were on every corner. The vibrant colors, the beautiful textures, the scrumptious smells, and the never-ending love I saw made me stop in my tracks. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I spent half of my life trying hard to be something I thought I wanted to be, and in one breathtaking moment everything I thought I believed in was thrown out the window. What had I been doing? Thinking back to that moment, I have no idea why I ever thought adopting a culture was better than trying to understand the one I was a part of.

Living in one culture does not mean that we have to give up our other culture. The trick is to find a good balance. As a South Asian female living in America, I’ve struggled to assimilate my whole life. Instead, I should have been learning to be comfortable in my own skin. Life is not about fitting into a neat little box. It’s about gaining wisdom and strength from experience. At the ripe age of twenty-two, I think I have finally begun to understand that a balance between my American culture and my Indian culture is possible. Like a patchwork quilt, each aspect is unique and wonderful on its own; but only when it has been sewn seamlessly together can a beautiful and inspiring picture be made.

Like many children born and brought up in the U.S. these days, I grew up exposed to two cultures and two languages.  American was my home, and India held my heritage.  My family shopped at Trader Joe’s and New India Bazaar, we watched “The Parent Trap” and “Kuch Kuch Hota Hai” on Friday nights, and, combining the best of both worlds, the lunch highest in demand during my elementary school years was a piping hot naan pizza.

Language barrier, there was little.  I felt comfortable going to school and chattering away with my friends about the latest flick or most recent development in the playground drama, and I was equally secure yammering on at home about how I really did not want to have masoor dal and band gobhi for dinner (I preferred mutter paneer) and could we please read a Birbal story before bed.

These Birbal stories were, along with all the other Amar Chitra Katha comics, Tinkle Digests, Champaks, Panchatantras, and countless more railroad-platform-market-bought magazines, written in English.  Tales of Angulimala, Jhansi ki Rani, Swami Vivekananda, Tantri the Mantri, Kapish the monkey, and the cherub-esque twins, Ramu and Shamu, sat beside Anne of Green Gables and Harry Potter on my bookshelf, all written in the ‘a, b, c’ alphabet.  The ‘ka, kha, ga’, loops, and lines of Hindi script were seen only a few times a year, in cards sent by air-mail from the other side of the world, wishing us many blessings on birthdays, Raksha Bandhan, and Diwali.

I never found the need to learn to read or write Hindi.  After all, I could communicate with all my relatives just fine in the spoken word.  I could (and still can)recite “Chandu ke chacha ne Chandu ke chachi ko Chandi Chowk mein chandni raat se chandi ki chamach se chatni chatai” faster than Peter could pick peppers and Sally could sell seashells.  My love for Bollywood is unparalleled (I’ve watched the aforementioned “Kuch Kuch Hota Hai” at least 35 times, at some point I wanted to name my future kid Zeenat, and the only Oprah episode I’ve ever watched is the one starring supercouple Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai-Bachchan).  During my summers in India, I devoured “Kasautii,” “Saat Phere,” and “Kasamh Se” with the enthrallment usually reserved these days for Pretty Little Liars and Gossip Girl — neither of which can hold a candle to the convoluted relationships of Indian soaps.

And I’m notorious among family and friends for sleep-talking in Hindi.

Yet, more recently, something had begun to nag at me.  How was it that I was learning how to read, write, and speak another language at school when I couldn’t even send my ammaji a nice, handwritten letter without it having to be translated?  Why was it that I couldn’t read the birthday cards that my bua had sent me when I was little?  I had tried to learn to read and write Hindi during my middle school summers, but efforts were futile as I lost close to all grasp of the 50-odd letters and 12 or so vowel additions every time school started back up.  The multiple “t” and “d” sounds confused me to no end and so I simply let it slide.

I’m not quite sure why this summer I decided to foray into learning the language again.  Perhaps it’s the sense of my childhood soon coming toward an end, as I will turn eighteen and then soon after graduate from high school to head off to spend four or so years elsewhere.  Perhaps it will turn out like my previous attempts, from which I can just barely remember how to write my own name and the words ghatia (useless) and shalgam (turnip).

But perhaps in a few months, I will be writing a nice, long letter to my ammaji, and we can catch up on the latest filmi gyan together.

Brown Girls, what cultural feats have you attempted?  Have you encountered language barriers?  Do you have any tips for me?  Leave them in the comments below!

In January 2008, Dr. Renu Khator became the thirteenth president of the University of Houston and the eighth chancellor of the University of Houston System. She joined a handful of female presidents of major universities and is the first South Asian president of a major university in the country.

Dr. Khator is certainly an inspiring woman for the South Asian community to be proud of. I had the privilege to interview her recently on behalf of BG. She took the time to answer my questions about her current position, the criticism and obstacles she faces, and the role of her Indian heritage in her life.

What exactly does the position of President of University of Houston and Chancellor of the University of Houston System entail? Can you describe a typical day at work?

As chancellor, I oversee the University of Houston System, which includes four separate universities – the University of Houston (UH), the University of Houston-Clear Lake, the University of Houston-Downtown and the University of Houston-Victoria.  Each of these is a distinct institution, not just branch campuses, with its own president.  In addition to being chancellor, I also serve as president of UH, the largest university in our UH System with 37,000 students.

Describing a “typical” day is hard because this job is so multi-faceted.  You are the CEO of a large business – the UH System has a $3 billion impact on the area’s economy each year – and the chief educational administrator and a student advocate and a major fundraiser and a cheerleader and a community leader.  I wear many hats – and that’s what makes this position so demanding and so satisfying.  So … a “typical” day might start with early morning meetings with some of my vice presidents and other administration leaders, followed by my observing a class, followed by giving a luncheon speech to a civic organization then visiting with an international dignitary visiting our campus followed by an hour or two returning phone calls and e-mails and performing other office work then attending some sort of social or athletic event – sometimes both – during the evening. Back home, I will probably spend some time catching up on university-related reading.

How do you develop a relationship with the student body to ensure that you are addressing their concerns and remaining aware of the issues that they are being faced with at the University?

From my very first day at the university, I have made it clear that Student Success is my top priority and everything my administration does must support that commitment.  I think my official policies reflect that. But it’s also important to establish a personal connection, which is a challenge with a student body as large as ours.  I make it a point to maintain a relationship with our leaders in the student government association and other prominent student organizations as well as make myself available to the student newspaper. Beyond that, I visit a number of classes each semester – and drop in at places like the coffee shops and restaurants, the bookstore and the residence halls.

I am sure that a position of such magnitude and influence also comes with a lot of critics. How do you go about handling the criticism that you must deal with on a regular basis.

Criticism is unavoidable.  If you are not getting any, you are not doing anything.  If it is constructive criticism, I try to make good use of it.  If it is destructive, I try to ignore it.  The challenge, of course, is recognizing the difference.

What are some of the most unexpected obstacles you have been faced with and the greatest challenges you have had to overcome in order to reach the position you are in today?

One unexpected obstacle, if you can call it that, was my own reluctance to recognize my early aspirations to become a leader.  Giving myself permission to follow my ambition was not easy.  As for the greatest challenges I had to overcome… well, as an immigrant woman, I always have known that I had to work harder to climb the ladder.

In your article, Breaking the Bamboo Ceiling, you write about self-imposed barriers and the limits and misconceptions that sometimes come with Asian cultural heritage. Has your Indian upbringing ever given you an advantage at any point? Have you ever felt that you needed to resort to the values, traditions, and lessons from your youth to get you through a certain situation?

Always!  I have always viewed my Indian heritage as an advantage and have always used my values and lessons to form my leadership and management style.  The biggest mistake people make is to either hide or deny their own heritage.  People often label my leadership style as inclusive, people-oriented and consensus-building.  I believe it is the result of watching my mother navigate through multiple players in a joint family and eventually accomplish her agenda. As examples of my pride in my heritage:  I frequently use stories from Indian history and quotes and poems from Indian authors.  My fashion style is also a fusion of Indian and American styles.

Dr. Khator with her husband, Suresh Khator.

South Asian culture obviously places a large emphasis on family values, and many times an individual’s identity is greatly distinguished by their relationships and who they are to other people. As a mother, do you feel as though your children have contributed to your success? Are there certain lessons that they have taught you that have helped you along your journey?

My daughters are a big part of my life, both personally and professionally.  It always felt like we were all part of a team with each of us pushing others to achieve their maximum potential.  Today, they are my soul mates and brainstorming buddies when it comes to difficult situations.  They have certainly helped me grow socially and culturally.  They truly are my eyes when it comes to seeing the world of today’s youth. Their pride in me is an inspiration in itself.

If you could give one piece of advice to young South Asian-American women about anything, what would it be?

If you are going to dream – and everybody should dream – dream big.   If a teenage immigrant girl in an arranged marriage with no knowledge of English can become president of a major American university, who is to say you can’t achieve what you set out to do as well?

What is your favorite or most memorable experience you have had while being University President and University Chancellor?

I’m pleased to say there are so many to choose from, it’s a difficult question.  Certainly the investiture ceremony, which celebrated my appointment as president, is one of them.   Another was the voters of Texas approving an amendment that will make funding available for UH to become a Tier One, nationally competitive research university.  Watching the proud faces of 7,000 students being awarded their degrees at our latest commencement exercise was thrilling.  And, I must confess, UH being ranked in the country’s Top 25 football teams last season was very special, too.

You are a role model for scores of people of all different backgrounds. In your article, An Ode to my Mother, you graciously credit your mother for your success. Apart from your mother, do you have any other role models that have taught you valuable lessons to help you become the person you are today?

Without a doubt, my husband, Suresh, has been a beacon of wisdom and the architect of my career.  Beyond that, I have also received important guidance and support from my mentors in the academic arena.  I don’t think you can underestimate the benefits of having a mentor.

The magnitude of your position and the rigorous schedule it involves probably do not allow for much free time, but when you do have the occasional moment to yourself, what do you enjoy doing?

Practicing yoga.  Keeping up with my family and friends. Just taking a walk around the neighborhood. Cooking, when that’s possible.  As you say, there’s not much free time –fortunately, I find that most of what I do professionally is also very satisfying personally.

If you would like to read the full articles referred to in the interview, follow the links below:

Breaking the Bamboo Ceiling: http://www.uh.edu/president/about/articles/pdf-files/Khator_ACE_bambooceiling.pdf.

Mother’s Day Special: An Ode to my Mother: http://getahead.rediff.com/report/2010/may/08/renu-khator-an-ode-to-my-mother.htm.
**correction to last post. Dr. Khator is not the first female president of a university in Texas. There have been a few before her. However, she joins a handful of amazing women who run universities across the US.

Ever since I was in eighth grade, the Board of Education felt it absolutely necessary to mandate a summer reading list comprised of the most boring books on the face of the earth. Every June after final exams, our English teachers would present us with the dreaded list. We would peruse the summaries of these arcane novels and attempt to pick the ones that seemed as though they would inflict the least amount of pain.

It would literally take me the entire summer to get through just three books. As a self-proclaimed nerd, I absolutely love reading and generally complete about fifteen to twenty novels throughout the summer. However, I found that after three pages of these selections, I would always manage to realize how sleepy I was. Although I feel it is impossible to enjoy every book that you read, you initially choose to read them because they have some relevance to you or your interests. I don’t think the Board grasped that concept very well.

For those students who did not even open a book during the school year, I’m sure it was effective to mandate reading. For students like me, it was simply a burden to have to decipher a book I could not understand for the life of me knowing that I would be tested on it as soon as I returned to school.

This is the first summer that I have not had to adhere to a summer reading list, and it is a very liberating feeling. There is something about bringing a book to the beach that relaxes me. I love spending my day curled up on a towel with my favorite book, some warm sand between my toes, the sun shining brightly above, and the sound of the waves in the background.

While I am not generally a creature of habit, there are four books that I feel compelled to read every summer that I highly suggest to anyone looking to do some pleasure reading this summer.

• The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini is a story of friendship, and it manages to make me cry every single time I read it.
• The Bean Trees by Barbara Kingsolver captures a girl’s abrupt journey into motherhood and illustrates the bond between a mother and a child perfectly.
• The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd is even better than the film. It traces a young girl’s search for a connection to her mother.
• Lastly, Writing On My Forehead by Nafisa Haji is the story of a Muslim-American girl of Indo-Pakistani descent striving to become a journalist.

Hopefully my list is a little bit better than the Board of Education’s list ever was!

When my parents used to tell my brother and me that we would be attending a pooja later that night, we would groan with disappointment and the protests would begin. “We just went to one last weekend, and we don’t even understand what’s going on,” we would whine. This would require me to get off of Facebook and cancel my plans to go to the mall with friends. I dreaded spending my Saturday night being interrogated by “aunties and uncles” about where I was going to college and what I would be studying. Babysitting little kids at a family friend’s Diwali party was hardly any better. While I recognized that I was of Hindu faith and an Indian American teenage girl, those words did not entirely resonate with me.

Last August, I moved into my dorm in Washington, D.C. where I would be attending the George Washington University. I was excited to begin a new chapter of my life where I made all of my own decisions including how I would be spending my Saturday nights. Much to my surprise, I found that after a few weekends of not sleeping, the idea of a college party had pretty much lost its glamour.

You know that completely cliché adage; you don’t know what you have until it’s gone? Oddly enough, that’s exactly how I felt. After a week of consuming salads, sandwiches, and every type of pasta known to mankind, of course I missed coming home to warm Gujarati food on the dinner table every night. More than that, however, I missed that sense of identity that I didn’t quite realize was being fulfilled back home.

Maybe it was watching some of my friends go to church every Sunday or seeing others attend Shabbat at the Jewish center on campus that triggered a feeling of jealousy that they had their own outside communities other than just the girls on our floor. Maybe it was the fact that my Caucasian friend across the hall knew more Hindi than I did thanks to her obsession with Bollywood movies. Maybe it alarmed me that my neighbor knew more about Hinduism as a first semester religion major than I did, or maybe it was the delicious smell wafting through the hall as her roommate ordered Indian food every week. Regardless, I came to realize that simply being Indian American meant nothing if I did not embrace the values and traditions that had been engrained in me since birth.

Between the Indian Student Association, the South Asian Society, and the Hindu Awareness Organization, I realized that there was always an event occurring on campus that could fill the void I was experiencing. I ended up lending dresses to the girls on my floor and attending Garba. By the end of the year, I had attended the Diwali show, Holi, the Holi show, listened to multiple guest speakers from the South Asian community, and even went to a few poojas that the Hindu Awareness Organization had held.

It’s funny how before I began my college career, everyone would tell me that college is the best time of your life and that you will really find yourself throughout the course of four years. At that time, I did not believe them as I honestly thought I knew who I was. After having completed only one year of college, I now understand that college truly is path of self-discovery. It’s amazing how one year away from home can entirely change my perception of three words: Hindu and Indian-American.

The next time my parents inform my brother and I that we are attending some sort of Indian event; they might be in for a shock, and my brother might just be the only one groaning.

As young women caught up in the grind of school, work, and Friday nights, we can easily lose sight of what it takes to keep us healthy and happy. Here are 12 basic healthy habits sure to give your day an added boost.

1. Eat a healthy breakfast. While it sounds easy, sleeping through the 6:30am alarm makes eating a morning meal much more difficult while you’re late and rushing out the door. Awaken 15 minutes early to give yourself enough time for some Honey Nut Cheerios (Pooja’s and my favorite).

2. Get at least 30 minutes of daily exercise. A quick jog on the treadmill or a walk around the block is all it takes to get the blood pumping. You think  more sharply, sleep better, and eat more heartily after exercise.

3. Smile at strangers. You don’t know whether they’re feeling blue, and your smile can brighten their day. You may even catch a cute guy’s attention!

4. Take your relationship slowly. You are young! Take your time and appreciate your man. It builds mutual respect, understanding of each other’s personalities, and a base for a solid union.

5. Keep in touch with friends. While this is difficult with our busy schedules, G-Mail and Facebook make it so much easier. A few of us on the Brown Girl staff have a G-Mail thread that grows both in length and in amusement.

6. Pick up a hobby. Find your inner desire and unleash it in a creative way! Painting, writing, photography, sports, whatever it is – participate in it and enjoy it!

7. Organize your space. A clutter-free house and desk space at work makes a huge difference. A clean and organized space makes you feel more productive, orderly, and in control of your surroundings.

8. Recycle. Don’t like that party dress hanging in your closet anymore? Your sorority sister just might get a dance out of it next Friday night! Recycle your clothes, shoes, furniture, books, and electronics. It’s great for beating the economic blues, and you and your friends get to try out “new” stuff!

9. Spiritual Fulfillment. Whatever your faith may be, a little meditation or reflection heals an aching mind. Concentrating on stressors and alleviating them through mental exercises helps strengthen focus, especially when life throws so many stressors at us every day.

10. Read a good book, and reflect on its message. Pick up a read that interests you, think about what the author wants to convey, and how that message can be applied in your life. If it’s chick-lit, have fun with it and fantasize about what your life may be like in the character’s shoes! Hello, shopaholic!

11. Go outside! Enjoy a bike trail, garden, walk around a lake, outdoor shopping mall, or just walk the dog! This summer, enjoy the outdoors with your friends instead of staying inside watching a movie.

12. Surround yourself with positive energy. A healthy life is filled with family and friends who care for you and want you to succeed. Concentrate on the things that make you happy and you’ll be healthy too.