As a global desi born in New York and raised in Africa and India, a lot of my weekends in Nigeria and India were spent with my grandparents and their friends playing Bollywood charades, watching Bollywood movies, and obsessing over iconic on-screen pairs like Kareena Kapoor Khan and Hrithik Roshan. In a nutshell, Bollywood movies helped me connect with my culture when I moved back to India. Now, you might be wondering how and why Bollywood plays such an important role not only in my life but in my grandparents’ lives as well.
Indian cinema dates back to the early 1900s and was dominated by large-scale musical romantic films that allowed viewers to escape from reality. Every character tries to bring different Indian personalities to life. That is the beauty of — no matter where you are geographically, you can relate, dream and stay connected to your Indian roots. After spending twelve years in India, moving back to the States meant rediscovering my identity, finding my community, and adjusting to a brand-new environment. Bollywood played a very significant role in helping me achieve that.
Today, Bollywood is a billion-dollar industry and is creating the same magic with stories beyond romance. As the times evolve, Indian cinema evolves with them. Today, with stories like “Dangal” and “3 Idiots,” Bollywood is breaking the stereotype and shedding light on important issues such as the representation of minorities and societal norms of success. This is inspiring today’s youth to voice their opinions through digital and social media storytelling.
After twenty-two years of living in three different countries, I’ve learned some of my biggest life lessons by watching Bollywood movies; lessons that played a role in helping me discover who I am today. Here are four movies that have helped me do that:
“Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara” is a story about three life-long friends discovering their fears, insecurities and purpose on a bachelor trip in Spain. The movie title translates to “you only have one life.” While a lot of us want to go on that exclusive road trip with our best friends, one dialogue in the movie that really stood out to me was: “Apne kaam ko apni life ke saath confuse mat karo. Tumhara kaam tumhari life nahi, sirf uska ek hissa hai,” which translates to “Don’t confuse your work with your life. Your work is not your life, it is only a part of it.”
We often center our goals around our dream job or our dream city to work in. But in that process, we can’t forget to cherish and live in the moment with our loved ones. One of my professors, who is a full-time marketeer and a part-time professor once told me, “Your work is like a fundraiser for all the things you like to do in life.” His quote came from his personal experiences of spending time with his young daughters. While he enjoys work, nothing can replace his kids’ happiness. So go on that impromptu trip, take a day off, and indulge in self-care. Stop feeling guilty for not staring at your laptop; take risks and do what you’ve always wanted to do because zindagi na milegi dobara!
“Jab We Met” is a story of two individuals, Aditya and Geet, who are very different from each other but are finding purpose in life through love and work. When their lives collide, they not only find true love, but they also discover themselves. A lot of my pre-teen and teen years were spent trying to perfect myself for others, feeling extra self-conscious, and not appreciating myself enough. Simple life decisions were dependent on societal norms and validation from friends and family, but never from myself. If there was one thing I could tell my younger self to do, it would be to scream “Mein apni favorite hu!” which translates to “I love myself!” every single night in front of the mirror. The one thing you should prioritize before everyone else is YOURSELF. If you don’t love yourself, how do you expect others to do so? Jab We Met, thank you for making me meet my wonderful self!
“Kuch Kuch Hota Hai” is an iconic Indian romantic musical that explores the famous concept of a love triangle between a guy, his female best friend, and his love interest over 10 years. It is a beautiful cinematic experience that talks about love, friendship, and family. The movie is a little extra special for me because we both celebrated twenty-two years together last year! “Pyaar dosti hai; love is friendship,” in a romantic and a platonic way.
Friends and significant others play very different roles, but at the core, they are your cheerleaders, the ones that help you grow and who always have your back! For true friends and partners, they will not expect you to change yourself for them. You will always have a tight-knit bond. So don’t change yourself for others; explore yourself, and grow in that process. The right friends and significant others will always be around.
“Wake Up Sid” is a story about a young rich brat who is inspired by an aspiring writer from Calcutta to go chase his own dreams and own up to them. “Wake up Ritz!” is something I still continue to tell myself! What is a dream, hobby, or something you’ve always wanted to try but didn’t give it a shot because of family restrictions, societal judgments or fear of failure? Have you thought about what the outcome could be if you chased your OWN dream? “Wake Up Sid” has been that reminder for me! While I was fortunate to have the most supportive family to allow me to pursue my dreams and explore opportunities, I wish I took the plunge for many other things I wanted to do when I was living in India.
But guess what: there is no right age or time to do anything! Despite the unfortunate pandemic, I took a digital acting course from the critically acclaimed Acting Institute in Mumbai, Actor Prepares! I am now certified in Film and Theatre. This is the first time I’m publicly announcing it, so you heard it here first! If you’ve always had something at the back of your mind; go chase it and do it!
Four iconic movies with four iconic life lessons have shaped me into the person I am today, and Bollywood continues to inspire and teach. I’m excited to learn about what Bollywood movies have impacted your lives — drop them in the comments below!
Dolly Singh is a content creator who is from South Delhi. She earned a bachelor’s in political science from Delhi University. Singh then attended The National Institute of Fashion and Technology. She even had her own blog called “Spill the Sass.” Fashion is a true passion for Singh as she made her outfit of the day debut on Netflix’s Bhaag Beanie Bhaagon. She has even appeared on Modern Love Mumbai Edition! Singh was awarded Cosmopolitan Blogger Award in 2021 and IWM Social Media Star in 2022. Continue to learn more about Dolly Singh’s journey!
What parts of your childhood pushed you into the world of content creation?
I have always been an introverted-extrovert kind of person. During my early teens I wouldn’t speak much at home but in school I was quite the talkative showgirl. When I look back it seems so paradoxical, almost as if I suffer from a split personality. Somehow my earliest childhood memories are of my loving to be on stage. I remember when I was in the 12th grade, I cajoled my teacher to include me in a singing competition since I had never ever sung live on stage and I was persistent in my effort for over 4-5 years and eventually she gave up and she said ‘okay its your last year why don’t you go do it ‘and of course in the process I realized what a bad singer I was. But just the sheer joy of being on stage, performing to a live audience and entertaining people is what stirred me at a deeper level. I think on the other hand my reserved side allows me to study people and their nuances and store all those observations in my memory data bank which helps me create great content. I wouldn’t speak much at home, but you know when I did, it was just 2 punch lines and everybody would either laugh or get awkward. I think I always knew that I was born to entertain, and it was my destiny’s calling. I would always get jealous seeing child actors on newspapers and television and I was like ‘oh my God, I am a child, and I could be an actor, living my dream life but I’m still stuck here’.
Do you feel what you do can inspire and impact the world? Please elaborate.
Of course, I think anybody with a decent following on social media has the potential to positively impact the community. Content creators enjoy a certain reach and it’s so important to handle that responsibility meticulously and the kind of message that you’re putting out needs to be respectful of certain socially expected parameters and mindful of the basic laws of the universe. It’s better to say nothing, then to say something stupid something that is going to just bring out the worst in people or send out misleading signals. I feel like the amount of content that audiences are consuming these days can trigger positive change if it’s done in the right manner. I feel strongly about a lot of topics, and I make sure that my platform is a reflection of that in some way. With content creators as opposed to film stars and celebrities, there is a direct engagement with audiences and a more one-on-one connection and hence content creators stand at a more leveraged position to influence audiences positively. I love body positivity as a topic.
Who were your fashion icons growing up?
Any fashion events that you envisage yourself at in the future to represent the brown renaissance? I think a lot of my inspiration came from the indie pop movement of the 1900s and the 2000’s. I started watching Hollywood movies and a lot of my inspiration started coming from the Bollywood Hollywood section in glossies and I made cutouts of the media, the models, the people. Then came Disney Channel and FTV and I used to watch those when my mom was away at work. I would love to represent India at the Paris, New York and London runways and walk for Indian designers who are using sustainable fabrics and indigenous designs and helping skilled artisans make a living in India. I love Madhu Sapre, Naomi Campbell, Tyra Banks, Cindy Crawford.
As you started a style blog in college, what were some of your favorite pieces of clothing in your early years?
Yeah, it was called Spill The Sass. I love blogging on T-shirts because there are so many ways that you could style a basic white T-shirt. Another blog I enjoyed back in the day was 5 ways to style maxi skirts. If I had to choose two pieces of clothing it would be a T-shirt and jeans!
How has your style evolved over the years?
It’s evolved from minimalistic and pocket friendly to being experimental and qualitative. The more I visited fashion weeks and events, the greater I experimented with outfit ideas that I curated personally. Over the years, I’ve started leaning more towards keeping it classy, chic and comfortable.
Tell us about your favorite online character since you make a bunch of them?
My favorite online character of mine would be Raju Ki Mummy because it’s based on my own mother.
If you could collaborate with anyone in the world, who would it be and why?
I would love to collaborate with Jenna Marbles. I love her to death. I discovered her few years ago and I would love to meet her in person. I mean she’s just a person who if I meet, I will just start sobbing like a child.
Have you faced adversity in your field? How have you risen from it?
Adversities are just an everyday fact of life but I like to believe my dreams and goals are bigger than my fears and setbacks. I know at the end of the day I want to be something; I want to give back and quitting isn’t the solution. Every time I face a creative block, I just tell myself this ‘get up and get to work, there are many who look up to you, you can’t disappoint them’. Also, the support from family, friends is nothing less than therapeutic especially when you’re having that typical bad day. I run towards therapy when I hit rock bottom, which happens quite often. We often feel burnt out, exhausted, tired, and just sad. I’ve been taking therapy for the last two years. It’s been beneficial. I’m not saying all my problems have vanished; that’s not how it works. It’s a continuous journey and a continuous process, but I think therapy is my mantra.
You recently turned into an entrepreneur with your own line of candles. Tell us more on what drove this decision and are there any other lifestyle products you will be launching?
As a creator I think it’s just natural to want to extend your brand trajectory to newer realms and not be stagnant in your growth path. It’s hard to gauge the shelf life of any creator considering there is stiff competition and there will be a sense of redundancy that seeps into the algorithm at some point. It’s always beneficial to expand your forte and explore multiple revenue streams is what I’ve gathered from so many interactions I’ve had with my industry peers over the past few years. There were many opportunities where people wanted to create merchandise of mine or partner on a fashion and accessory line but I wasn’t very mentally ready given my hectic schedules. I was a customer of Rad Living and after the pandemic I went into this zone of binge buying so much self-care stuff and you know candles was one of them. So when this came about I think I was ready to experiment and expand and was looking for an avenue to invest my energies on something enjoyable. I had already made a content piece on candles before this offer came my way so I had a list of quirky candle names, taglines for fragrances, matching the fragrance notes with the names. I think with this inning the whole ‘Creator’ part to me really came to use here as well and that’s what was exciting about this and it was funny because it was such ‘a life comes to a full circle’ moment for me. My mom was into candle making because Nainital at that point was known for its candles and she used to make such variety of candles, 100s of types of candles and all my life I mean the first 16-17 years of my life I’ve just seen my mom make candles at home and our house were full of wax and everything was just candles. My father used to sell candles and it was my family business. Let’s just say that I’m taking forward the family legacy and I’m very excited to go home and to my father’s shop in Nainital and put my candles there and sell them!
Will there be any lifestyle products you’ll be launching?
I was so nervous about this candle launch as I never wanted to mislead my audiences and have them indulge in something that’s mediocre. I really invested my heart and soul in this venture, and thankfully the response has been beyond phenomenal. Courtesy all the good word of mouth publicity, I’m thinking of maybe launching my own beauty and fashion line in about 2 years!
What have been your favorite content pieces that have you worked on this far?
I love most of my content pieces as I’m very particular about each one of them so it’s hard to pick a favorite. One of them is a mini film called Aunty Prem Hai and it’s about an orthodox lady finding out that her nephew is queer from his ex-boyfriend, and this is a first time reveal since the nephew has never come out of the closet. There’s also this series called How Aunties Talk About Sex, and I’ve given a twist to how old-timer desi Indians broach the topic of sex based on how I’ve seen my mother interact with her friends, post dinner conversations amongst relatives, and how it’s more like a taboo.
What are your favorite social media trends?
Anything that emits positivity and gratitude. It’s important that social media trends invoke a sense of intellectual enhancement. Anything that kind of teaches you something that enriches your existence or makes you want to live life more wholesomely. I also enjoy throwback trends, something to do with special memories and nostalgia, because I feel old school is always timeless.
Do you feel people are so trapped in social media that they forget about the world around them outside of their laptops, phones, and tablets?
Yes. Personally it’s been a task for me to get detached from technology and balance the real and the reel. In the last couple of years, I have consciously cut down on my screen time, even though it’s all work and no play for me. Social media is so omnipresent and it’s sometimes scary to see this crazy social media obsession where people forget there’s a real world out there with real people and you need to forge real connections that are deeply rooted in authentic exchanges. It’s scarier to see how social media trends have now become rules to live by for a more meaningful existence for many when on the contrary that shouldn’t be the case.
It’s a word that invokes a sense of pride in me because for me it’s all about being innovative, authentic and self-made. Influencer on the other hand is something that doesn’t resonate with me because there’s no real job description. I’ve always maintained my stand of not being an influencer as I create content and make a living out of being creative and curating an audience for myself over the years.
As you’ve worked with Priyanka Chopra, Kareena Kapoor Khan, Aayushmann Khurrana, and others do you hope to be more involved in Bollywood? Tell us about your acting projects.
Of course, I would love to be more involved in the film industry not just in India but globally too. I think there is so much scope for the South Asian community to make a mark in world cinema and it’s time we pick up more Oscars and Grammy’s in the coming times. Anyone who is a creator is also a film star at heart. 90% of creators who make sketches and skits are facing the camera 24×7, making original content, improvising on scripts and all of that stems from that innate ability to be great performers who can keep an audience engaged. I would love to someday have my own podcast where I interview film personalities and get into their skin. I love the dance and song sequences in Bollywood films, and I think I’d be great doing that as well! I’d love to see how I can get out of my comfort zone and do something that doesn’t directly relate to my online alias in the future. I got a lot of offers during the lockdown and shot for a film in 2022 which sees me in a leading role and I’m excited for it to launch later this year. I’m working on some writing projects as I would love to script a documentary or a short film.
Lastly, what do you hope to take away from this interview with Brown Girl Magazine?
I think the questions have been great. The questions have been answered in a way that I feel so confident about myself right now, and I feel so proud about myself and that says a lot. I would like to thank Brown Girl Magazine for taking time out to interview me. I hope this inspires the brown community across the world!